A Guide for men on WOMEN!!!! LOL Must read!!!

Why don't men understand that when they say 'What's wrong?' and we say "nothing" we ACTUALLY mean, you snore, you leave the toilet seat up, your mother's driving me insane AND you going out for "A PINT" on a friday and returning sunday afternoon asking 'what's wrong?' is not the way to show you care! If one pint gets you in that much of a state and takes 48 hours to consume then its no wonder women have trouble parking cars as a pint must be at least the size of of a small tibetan community so an inch?? well let's not even go there lol

When you ask 'what do you want for your birthday?' and we say 'nothing' if you take this as the actual truth you are probably in for a night to remember consisting of deathly silences, evil glares and when we are angry and stressed out enough several pieces of smashed crockery and insults about you and every member of your family!!

And Why oh why oh why would smiles, long walks on the beach, holding hands and watching the sun go down before talking endlessly all night about our hopes and dreams turn into a desired night of promised romance consisting of a Premier football match, a four pack of beer and a number of the local curry house?

Are you starting to see where the problem lay??

I know your going to say we nag, we are to bossy, too demanding and turning into our mothers BUT getting up for work, falling over your dirty trainers, finding the toilet seat up, the toothpaste squeezed in the middle, the empty milk carton in the fridge and the car keys in your dirty jeans that just didnt quite make it to the laundry basket all before 7am is enough to drive the quietest most timid creature into a snarling, raging, PMT filled maniac that resembles the incredible hulk on a bad day and you open your eyes and say 'what's wrong?' Our reply??? "NOTHING!" lol

Sleeps for wimps

Well can you believe I had had my first lie in for weeks and woken up sick!!:'( lol

I have a thumping headache, a throat that feels like the bottom of a parrot cage (yum lol), a sore leg!! how random is that! and a spot on my face the size of the grand canyon that happens to be so sore I reckon the core of it is in my ankle, hence the sore leg!!! lol

Normally I have about 4 hours kip wake up, dive out of bed, get ready and go to work where may I add there are 1560 screaming 11-16 year olds and life is great!

All in all proving my theory that sleep is for wimps and trying to relax just causing sickness!!! lol
Oh well several Ibruprofen and a bucket load of caffeine and I should be feeling my usual wired, happy self with the added luxury of several new ailments! roll on Monday! lol :DD

Men only do two things wrong. EVERYTHING they say and EVERYTHING they do!

Yep that's me! bitter and twisted and loving it :)
Im divorced (twice!) can ya tell! and have built an emotional wall that exceeds the Great Wall of China around myself.

My second husband cheated on me and I couldn't believe that another female would do that so now I assess the situation.....

Be a married man's bit on the side??? erm let me think.......
1. I don't have to listen to him moan on and on.
2. No dirty clothes thrown casually EVERYWHERE!
3. No washing of dirty socks.
4. No having to listen to his mother and pretending you care.
5. The TV remote....all mine!!!!!!
6. Doing what I want, when I want, with whom I want and he can't say squat!!!
7. Sex when you fancy it, the pressies, the dinners out, none of the crap!!!

God this women is a genius!

Well now I have had a chance to think about it wow she has impressed me.... ONLY I divorced him and now she has him full time........or does she???